Just Say No: Thigh High Boots

Pop Quiz.
I bet you I can guess the first thing that went through your mind when you read "Thigh High Boots":


Yet for some reason, women keep trying to wear them in real life. I think the fact that they are "dangerous" and "lewd" is why so many try to make them work, but they rarely, if ever, succeed.
Exhibit A:

Julia Stegner is a model. Generally models can break any fashion rules set for mortals. Super mini skirts! Sky-high heels! Exposed Nipples! You name it, they've worn it. And even THEY can't pull of thigh high boots without looking like a lady of the night. Of course Julia ran into even MORE trouble by pairing her white boots with a tight gold turtleneck dress, but still. If she can't do it, we can't either.

But what if they're not worn with a short skirt? Can they look good then?
Exhibit B:

This mysterious (and possibly French) lady snapped by The Sartorialist brings up an interesting point of view. By layering it over skinny jeans, she's brought a new super-slim silhouette. The silhouette is so slim that it seems to suggest she isn't wearing at all, and wearing nothing at all* + thigh high boots = Emperors VIP Club employee. But the French can get away with anything so unless you are French, I wouldn't recommend trying this either.
Update: I have been informed by a commenter that the lovely lady in question is in fact from Spain and is a stylist. My point still stands though, those in the Iberian Peninsula can get away with anything.

Surely there must be a time when thigh high boots have looked good, you say. And yes you are right.
Exhibit C:

Angela Lindvall wore some killer boots** for the Spring 2003 Chloe ad campaign. I stared at them incredulously because I couldn't believe I craved such things that usually cause disgust in my head. For 5 years I've gone back to this image and tried to figure out how this works so well, I don't know if it's the carefree attitude or if Angela Lindvall can just make everything look awesome.

So come next fall, when you are shopping for new winter boots and you come across these boots by Chanel (right) and Narciso Rodriguez (center and left), remember what we've talked about today. It'll save you a few dollars and some catcalls.

* Bonus points for you if when you read that sentence all you kept thinking was Stupid Sexy Flanders in a ski suit shaking his ass.
** Ok, so Angela is technically wearing over the knee boots which aren't as extreme as thigh high boots, but that only illustrates my point further. Thigh high boots never looked good and knee high boots give you the same effect without the sleazy association. ;)


Di said...

The girl from the sartorialist is a spanish stylist and her name is Bárbara Martelo.

(sorry for my english)

Anonymous said...

I think thigh high boots are automatically hooker-esque if they're WHITE, PATENT, or contain CLEAR plastic parts on them...and you have to have nice legs with a skirt that looks right with them....and...its hard to pull off during the day, MAYBE if they're plain non-patent leather...and the right attire (shirt dress, denim skirt, etc.) Also if you're TOO made up...like you're trying to get "business", then no...you shouldn't wear them...stick to the clear lucite stripper platforms LOL

Otherwise, I think thigh highs in like..stretch suede, or a plan leather are really hot!

laia. said...

that is a good point anonymous!

Anonymous said...

Whats wrong with being a little lewd? Ive never complained when people wear the "Peasant Girl" look, or when they combine polka dots with stripes...or even when they part their hair down the middle, while voicing their support for Jennifer Aniston. Its fashion...fashion evolves and becomes more tailored the longer you play with it. May I remind you of The Devil Wears Prada? We see thigh highs on the main character. (She even wore them with a suit in real life) They are stylish, they are fabulous, and they, like most great fashions, require tailoring and rules. And they CAN work in white btw. Most hookers prolly cant afford them anyway. They are expensive. I think the word you all are looking for is STRIPPER. Men like strippers, last I checked. :D

Anonymous said...

Thigh high boots do look awesome! Mysterious sexy and teasing. I love them more than any footwear!